![Jenn Tuttle [Loveographer] logo](http://www.jenntuttle.com/wp-content/uploads/p4/images/logo_1326151726.png){kind=logo}
**Autumn has an update at the bottom of this blog.
As I sit down to write this blog I have a huge knot in both my throat and my stomach. I dont even know where to begin with such a blog…
Autumn first came in for pictures when she was 1yrs old… she was full of life and ready to take on the world. Shortly after her session Autumn started under going testing… something was going on inside of Autumn and nobody knew quite what it was. During that year they got closer and closer to answers but still there were questions.
At about 1 1/2 Autumn came in with her mommy to show off her soon to be baby brother… she was so excited to become a big sister and it truly showed! It was only a month after this session when they found out just how serious her disease is.
A little background, written by Dawn (Autumns Mommy):
“I am a mother of 5 beautiful children. My husband & I were told we would never have children so we adopted 3 beautiful siblings over 3 years ago. 5 days later found out I was pregnant with my baby girl Autumn. Never expecting the pregnancy to take b/c I had had 6 miscarriages in the past. Even with a tough pregnancy she was a fighter and made it! Not long after I found out I was pregnant again this time with a boy. We had him Decemeber of 2010 & named him Logan. Shortly after Autumn’s first birthday right after Logan was born she came very ill and ended up in the hospital. We were told that she had what they thought was Leighs disease. After going home and looking it up on the computer I was devistated. How could our miracle baby have such a nasty debilitating disease & to think our son has a 25% chance of having this as well just kills us inside. Right now I have been giving it to God. This is too big for me to fight alone so I have asked the lord for that miracle I know he can do but I also know has to be his will. At this time we are just taking one day at a time and enjoying all the time we have with out little girl.”
Autumn then came in for her 2yr session… goodness this precious little girl was filled with joy from her head to her toes. By this time she was diagnosed with Leighs disease (Jan 7 2010) & along with that she was diagnosed with the complex IV deficiency type surf 1 (July 2010). Leigh’s disease is a mitochondria disease which is a terminal, with no known cure. That didnt stop Autumn one bit… she was a little shakey and couldnt stand for too long but was still full of wonderfulness and was so strong going on about life with a smile on her face! Pure joy in this little angel!
By her 3rd year Autumn found herself in the hospital many times… the disease was starting to progress but Autumn beat all the odds and showed those doctors just how strong she is and how hard she fights!
Autumn is still fighting… her time here… nobody knows… but she is touching MANY MANY lives! She is such an inspiration and she warms my heart completely. At times I find myself asking WHY… I know its not my place to ask why… but its hard not to. Autumns mommy, Dawn, is the strongest woman I know. She doesnt take the time she has with Autumn for granted… and values every moment with her…
I will start with the pictures… here is Autumn at her 1 yr session with me…
Autumn at her mommys maternity session… so proud to be a big sister!
.jpg "IMG_8129-bw-copy")
Here is Autumn at her 2yr session. She is so very girly and her joy is overwhelming… I couldnt pick just a few favorites… there were so many wonderful ones…
And here is Autumns newest session… since Autumn is so girly and loves foofoo things we decided on doing some fun shots with her… just as she would have loved to do if she could tell us what she wanted.
Once we started with these shots it was very hard to keep it together… Im usually pretty good at holding it together… but I am only human and I am so close to Autumn that these really hit me hard. I wanted to make sure I showed the amazing warmth and love between her and her mommy. Along with her mommy, Autumn has so much support from her family and friends… she has an army behind her of loving people… what a blessing! Autumn you have touched so many hearts and opened so many eyes… you are amazing in every way.
As Dawn spoke soft beautiful words to her daughter I caught connection, real raw emotion… I floated around the room documenting moments not everybody gets to see… this is REAL… next time you think about updating your status to “FML”… think about this! From Dawns page:
“One thing that really irritates me at times is when people see their lives not going well & the quickest thing out of their mouth or on fb is FML….Things could be so much worse & instead of saying FML maybe people should re evaluate why they should LML (Love My Life). I have a child that is terminal & getting worse & it is getting closer to planning a funeral for her… ” ”…LML for my terminal child that has made me such a better person, mother, care giver, closer to GOD & not afraid of death anymore…” ”Just in general LML for me being able to even look at the brighter side rather then the darker & LML that I am still here to experience it all!!!!!”
Dont take your life for granted… love like youve never loved before… dance like nobody is looking… sing out loud because you shouldn’t care what people think… respect people… dont get mad at the person in front of you taking their time because you NEVER know what that person is dealing with in their personal life, they could be savoring every moment they have left… and please please hold your loved ones tightly because tomorrow is never promised.
To follow Autumns story and progression you can find her on FB: Autumn’s Facebook Page
And THIS is why I do what I do… giving a gift like this is the most meaningful thing in the entire world…
“I love the pics SO MUCH! I know autumn has touched you in so many ways but you as well have touched us. You have captured some of the most memorable times & personalities with her. Reading your blog & seeing the pix was such a special gift & you mean a so much to us for doing this for us. I cant thank you enough for everything & you have such a special wonderful talent Im so proud of you for becoming & doing all you love & having the great opportunity to really make a difference in peoples lives the way you do.
Thank you so much!” -Dawn
**6/11/2012 - An Update on Autumn: Autumn is 4 today … and still giving one heck of an amazing fight! In October 2011 she was given just 2 weeks to live… and here she is today still giving it her all… she has escaped and fought, what could have been the end, numerous times despite what the doctors say. She’s been in 2 comas since October and has had multiple seizures. Autumn is truly the strongest little girl Ive ever met! There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of this amazing little girl… she’s so strong and so inspiring! I love you Autumn… Happy 4th Birthday honey!
Pin It
by Jenn Tuttle
Just found your site and stumbled on this story! I just wanted to say that I don’t know you personally but you now have me in tears. It sometimes makes you wonder why and how … May god bless you all luv and hugs xoxo
Your post is amazing and this little sweetheart’s Mom is an inspiration to all of us. I have been whining about how my family were sick through Christmas (with minor colds and flues)and now I realize how petty I sounded. This post is amazing and you are an amazing photographer for capturing such beauty and warmth. Much admiration to you and to this family.
Thank you Jenn ! That was an Amazing Blog/ and updated pictures you have done! I will treasure them as Dawn and her family will also! You are a “Special” Lady! I love them all so much but am so far away in IA! I pray so much for Autumn and her family it never leaves my thoughts ! The Lord some how always knows they are in my thoughts and Prayers! Autumn has touched lives everywhere …AMAZING IS HER JOY AND STRENGTH ! HER SMILE IS INFECTIOUS! thx again Jenn! Hugs! My sister is a photographer …actually 2 of my sisters love that but one has recently opened her own on the side! You are an inspiration and wish all of them had your attitude and love that you have shown in your pictures!
I LOVE these pictures. I met Autumn and Dawn through a mutual friend. My daughter also has a type mitochondrial disease. This family is truly a testament to God’s love and strength!
Those photos of Dawn holding her precious Autumn were the most beautiful sights I have seen….
These pictures are priceless. After Autumn has gone home to be with God, her earthly parents, Dawn and John, will be able to look at these pictures and remember the best times with Autumn. These last pictures also show how much of a fighter Autumn is. She is not giving up and neither is Dawn. A lot of people might want to hide from the world because this disease isn’t pretty, but not Dawn nor Autumn. They have gracefully shared Autumn with the world to bring awareness to Mitochondria Disease.
Thank you for sharing the beautiful pictures and for providing something so precious for Dawn and John to hang onto forever.
I just cried my eyes out. This is so unbelievably tragic.
I don’t even have words for this. I am speachless.
I have tears rolling down my face and my hearts breaks for this little angel and her family.
From one photography to another.. girl you captured the most beautiful photos that you will ever capture. You have captured the moments that Autumn’s parents will never forget.
Thank you so much for sharing the pictures of my beautiful and precious granddaughter and my beautiful and loving daughter. They and your blog meant so much to me and as always, when I see pictures and read stories of my “little fighter”, it brings tears to my eyes. Although I whish things were different and Autumn was a healthy little three year old, God had other plans for her. She has touched so many hearts and lives of many, many people, even family members. She is truly a blessing and when she leaves this earth for her heavenly home, she will continue to touch the lives of many. God bless you for bringing such a beautiful story to life in pictures. You are amazing.
Jenn, Thank you so much for keeping a record of Autumn’s journey. It’s been very hard on the family and you have blessed us over and over with the most precious, holy moments caught on film that I have ever seen. Some would say Autumn’s story is tragic, and in some ways it is heartbreaking, terrifying, paralyzing. When viewed through the lens of our Gracious Heavenly Father, though, it is a story of hope, strength, comfort, and yes, even of joy. Each one of us has been blessed by Autumn. As a mother of two small children, I will always wonder at Dawn’s strength. She is, and will always be, a mentor, leader, woman of Faith, fighter, an inspiration, and an amazing mother and friend. I am proud to be part of the same family as this amazing woman. Thank you for continuing to share Autumn’s story.
Another mom posted this on our facebook feed. I like to read some of the story’s that come across the feed.Stories you wouldn’t normally read unless re posted by someone who was really touched by it. I am crying my eyes out, I have piles of tissue in front of me.My 2 children are asleep in the next room.I could not even imagine a fraction of what you are going thru. I clearly take for granted a lot of things in my life. The picture’s are amazing!!! Autumn’s zest for life is beautiful. It melts you with every shot. After reading this blog I will definitely think twice about complaining about anything trivial in my life.I booked marked it and know I will be back many times to read it…when I have a bad day, or the kids are to much at that moment. Thank you for sharing Autumn story, you have truly opened my eyes. Many hugs to you & your family.
A friend posted this link on her facebook page, so I decided to look at it. what a moving a beautiful experience. It brought me to tears. Tears of sadness, beauty, love, and joy in the hope we have in Christ Jesus. Thanks for sharing your heart and art.
These are GORGEOUS photos! Fabulously done! Autumn Ruth is a beautiful little girl!!!! <3
I think ALL of these pictures are simply beautiful. Your heart and love for this little girl shows through every picture. You have done maternity pictures for a friend of mine recently and they were beautiful. I wish I would have had pro pictures taken of my son before he passed away from cancer. Losing a child is the worst thing a mommy can go through. They will be in our prayers and I pray that these beautiful photos will help in some small way to keep that precious baby girl’s memory alive.
God Bless You,
Cathy
LML<3
What a beautiful baby and precious. My heart breaks for all of you. to have a child with a terminal illness is scary and crushing. I will pray for you and this family. I feel Dawn is a very strong and blessed mommy and mother. Sometimes we do not understand why certain things happen the way they do but it is all in gods will and timing. May God bless each one of you.
all i can say is…BEAUTIFUL with tears flowing.
Thank you! Thank you for sharing this tear jerker! You have a wonderful talent to capture life and share how special each and every momment needs to be. I have lost a little one at the young age of 5 years old. So everyone make sure you cherish all the momments big and little as you never know which one may be the last.
I just can’t stop crying after reading this. My son passed away around an hour after he was born from a birth defect. Watching him struggle to breathe and listening to his little gasps was the worst thing I have ever gone through. I could not imagine watching for years.
Autumn is such a beautiful little girl, I amazed at the strength of her and her family. The pictures are gorgeous, but the difference between the two year and three year just kills me inside.
*tears are pouring out of my eyes uncontrollably!* I have a 3 yr old little boy and a 1 year old baby girl. I can not imagine going thru anything this hard. The very thought of them catching a common cold breaks my heart. As parents we do not want our children to be sick or hurt in any way, But then that is when we turn it over to God and let him take fully control. I believe this precious little girl has been put on earth to touch people. And by the amazing photos and the words wrote in full honesty her reason for being is being accomplished. Then as parents, grandparents, and every eye reading this needs to believe and pray for a miracle!!! Let her story not only show how wonderful life is and how not to take one second for granted BUT also show that JESUS does STILL perform miracles EVERYDAY! May God bless this precious family and heal in the name of JESUS!! Thank you for sharing these photos. The power of love is received! Then given back to you! (((((((((hugs)))))))))) ^^^^^prayers^^^^^
Thanks for sharing these. Autumn is a precious girl. This is a reminder to us to don’t forget to tell our loved ones how much we love them and to hug them.
I was a photographer and had a similar story. A couple brought in a little girl who was 2. She was beautiful, but you could tell she was sick. I was 18. Was in love with kids, but was told I couldn’t have any. (a lie) so I immediately asked if I could hold her. We went through the session and I kept talking about how good she was. So easy to pose and all. As I loaded pictures for her parents they broke down. I didn’t know if I said something or what. So I asked if it was ok. She said that the little girl had cancer and was terminal. The doctor gave them a few weeks. How do you respond? I hugged her and was speechless. Why? I am a Christian, but this question is hard. Here I am thinking this little girl had a cold and she was dying. I cried and prayed for them so many times, but she’s with God now. That is the comfort I think her family needed.
What a touching story. Bless Autumns little heart. I can’t imagine what it must be like, and I am thankful that she has the loving parents she has. One day at a time, prayers for all of the family.
Wow, this story broke my heart, but made me realize not to take the moments I have with my children for granted. I am the mother of four beautiful daughters ranging in ages from (6yrs to 1 month)which is challenging at times, and frustration comes often, but after reading this blog it made me realize just how short life really is, and just how easy it is to take everyday for granted and just how much we take health for granted. Thank you for sharing this inspiring story and beautiful photos.
What a truly heartbreaking and inspiring story. Its left me speechless. What amazing strong parents she has and what a gorgeous little girl. I will be hugging my boys a little tighter tonight. Thank you for sharing this blog and making us all aware of just how precious life is.
Children are a gift form God for however long they are here. I have cried over this story and Autumn’s pictures are stunningly beautiful. May her remaining time continue to be a blessing to all who know her.
Touched – so touched what heartfelt moment you captured posting LML on my fan page today and often as remembrance how precious life is and what a gift Autumn is. LML ALWAYS – JILL
………….Jenn, there are no words. What an incredibly, beautiful story told in these photos. Thank you so much for sharing your talent and Autumn’s story. May God bless that amazing family.
Parent like you are amazing and your daughter is precious. I had a daughter that had a birth defect called holoprosencephaly she had one of the worst cases and I carried her full term and she only lived 5 days and I will cherish those 5 days forever. She would have been 8 this May and I am think people like your daughter are precious gifts sent from God. I will be praying for you and your family.
God Bless,
Kim Morgan
This is truely an amazing story! It’s amazing to see how the sickness moved soo quickly! She is sooooo beautiful! I havent looked at something and just instantly started balling! I will be praying for her, and she is in good hands, with God by her side! She has such great parents to help her through this aswell! You are a very strong family and keep the happiness going!
As a mom my heart is broken for her. You just cant make it through this post without kleenex.You documented their love and bond perfectly. I just stumbled upon your blog. Your words are heartfelt..they are so so real. Thank you for sharing autumns story and thank you for this post.
What beautiful pictures. What a gift from God.
Truly this precious little Angel is a gift from God and for reasons that we don’t know her life (short of a miracle) will be back in our Father’s arms. It is so hard to try and understand why such a precious gift has to be given for such a short time, but I am sure that in the short time she has been on this earth she has touched many lives and brought her family so much joy. My heart goes out to this special little Angel and her family and I pray that God will change His mind and give her body a total healing, but if that isn’t His plan than I pray that God will bring peace to Autumn and her family and that they may have comfort knowing that she will once again be in the arms of our Loving Father. God Bless this Wonderful family.
This story is so heart breaking but yet so unbelievable amazing of a mothers bond between her and her child. These are the most amazing pictures of a mothers love for her child, that no one can ever touch. You are truly an amazing mother Dawn and God has blessed you with that beautiful Angel that you will always hold dear to your heart. As we go through life we don’t always understand why things like this happen and how could it to a innocent child, but be assure that our Lord and savior has a plan for each and everyone of us and this little Angel has touched so many. So Dawn thank you for this heart breaking but beautiful moment you shared with all of us. God Bless You and Your Family.
Came across this on Facebook. I cried all the way through the story, and the pictures. I am a mother and even though I can not image what you are going throughi feel in my heart the love for this little amazing girl.she is beautiful, and thus story has touched me in so many emotional ways.I pray for you all and may your little girl continue touching so many lives. Thank you for sharing and u will be in my prayers. LML
Kimberly Miller.
WOW this story just touched my heart in so many ways! I cried through the whole story shes a very beautiful little girl and has touched so many lives! May GOD bless this little girl and family. SHES BEAUTIFUL! <3
I wish you could post this in the paper for millions to view.. since I read Dawn’s post about “fml” I have thought so many times “how can people write that,,” ugh, this will make a difference in so many lives.. please contact the paper with your story… it is so powerful and important. Thank you for posting.,, this is awesome! Cathie
It amazes me how much we take for granted and how we seem to constantly curse our own lives by saying stupid things like FML…although I have never used that expression, I know plenty of people who have…If they only new what they were doing by making such a remark. Well I do believe that your story is God’s way of using you to make a difference in the way people look at themselves as it forces them to take a moment to reflect on their blessings. Then perhaps they wouldn’t feel sorry for their short comings as everything happens for a reason. Autumn is a beautiful gift from God and her family has been blessed with her..Their story should be told and shared with all..God Bless your family as they go through these trying times..I have truly been touched by you and your beautiful daughter Autumn..Thank you for being so brave.
This is the first time that I have read one of your blogs. I want to THANK YOU for sharing this with us. Life is often times taken for granted and this blog is just a reminder of how precious it is!
I stumbled on your page and read this story. I am in tears. Wonderful Photos.
amazing jenn. amazing words and amazing photos. my heart goes out to beautiful little autumn and her strong family
Wow! What a blessing!! Just wanted to praise God and thank you for sharing such special moments! VERY inspiring!
This is a very touching story. I am currently in a youth group at my church and I plan on sharing this with them. We lift up all of our prayers to you and your family especially Autumn. I will pray the most powerful prayer I know for you guys and I truly wish you guys the best!
Xoxo,
marissa
Ps. She’s Beautiful.<3
One word describes this shoot. Amazing! This Mom and her daughter are total strangers but what you captured actually made me cry. That is pure talent. What a gift you have provided for this Mom to cherish forever. Thank you for sharing!
Amanda
God placed you in this mother’s life to provide her with these “Wonder-Filled Memories.” Wow, what a special child and a wonderful mother!
I love hearing updates about this beautiful little girl. I have no words just joy bursting that she made it to her 4th birthday. I continue to hope and pray for you guys. As soon as I opened the blog and heard the music start, my heart stopped, This is the song I’ll be using to walk down the aisle to for my wedding in a year, I think this song will now always remind me of this beautiful strong fighter of a child! Happy Birthday Autumn, I hope you have many more to come.
I ran into this post just recently and touched my heart so much. I have worked with many children and they all have held a special place in my heart. Children in general are all little angels from God. I am now a new Mother and life changed my perspective in so many ways, better than before. God is definitely a work in progress for so many and he gives blessings to everyone. These pictures are beautiful and it shows so much comfort and love you have for your beautiful daughters. Your family will be in my thoughts. I pray for continuing strength and courage for all of you.
God Bless!
The Torres Family
[...] Autumn's Story [...]
I saw this blog when it was first posted, now I have returned to use Autumn’s story in an essay for college. My topic is whether or not having faith in God can heal people. Autumn was the first to pop in my head. So here I am looking at these pictures again with tears in my eyes! This little girl, she is such a tough cookie.